My Daughter Left

I was sitting in my sauna crying like a baby.

I wasn’t prepared for what was happening.

Missy and I had just gotten back from Hawaii where we dropped our daughter off for a year long discipleship training program (a year ago).

I didn’t realize kids leaving can cause grief and sadness like this. 😭 

I was talking to a multi seven figure owner this week and he was like…

“yea we’re trying to figure out if we should just push the peddle to the metal and take on more (stress, time requirement, etc) and if will be worth it?”

My answer? No.

Why?

That was me when my daughter (Liberty) was growing up.

More-more-more.

I’m not opposed to more.

“More” has to be built through constraints

More should be measured! 

Greed will say YES to everything unhealthy.
More for more’s sake ain’t good.

I think part of my grieving was the realization that I’ll NEVER get that time back with Liberty. Her leaving marks the transition in life. She’s becoming a legit adult. That time IS GONE. Whyyyy??

I said yes to unintentional more and would change that if I could go back.

Thank God she’s back (for now). But this perspective has changed a lot about my life.

I’m not willing to sacrifice my family (or time with them) in order to chase more that doesn’t add substantially to my life.

What about you?

Are there things that you might be sacrificing in the name of more?

-Important relationships
-Emotional and physical health
-Relationship with God
-Getting into a new hobby (I recommend fly fishing!)
-Passion project
-Contributing time to a great cause

Don’t delay living! We’re not promised tomorrow.

Here are things to consider in scaling from a place of joy and giving vs anxiety and greed:

1. Why Do I Want More?
   

   1. If it’s truly what I want, why? (go layers deep)

   2. Will it make me look good, give me status, etc?

   3. Is it in alignment with an identity that has nothing (or very little) to do with “success”?
      
      Healthy identity builds from…
      

      Intentionality: Provision / Transformational / Contribution / Meaning and Fulfillment

      
      If you were to draw your wants on paper would they fall under one of these areas? If not I’d examine

      Unhealthy identity builds from…
      

      Unintentionally: Greed (never enough) / Transactional / Taking / Low Meaning or Fulfillment
      

2. Scaling FROM Constraints? 

   1. To hit X revenue / targets it has to be within 30 hours per week

   2. To hit X revenue / targets it has to from peace not stress

   3. To hit X revenue / targets it’s 10% growth not 40% 😂 

   4. To hit X revenue / target it’s from 30% profit margin

   5. To hit X revenue / target I’m having dinner with the fam 5 nights a week

   6. To hit X revenue / target my phone is off every night at 7 pm

Constraints are life-giving but very few of us honor them. Constraint is another word for boundary. Install them!

3. Considering The Other Four

   When we figure out how to make a bunch of money as entrepreneurs we usually stay in that vein to accumulate as much as possible.
   
   In the process we neglect the other important parts of us and it has negative consequences.
   
   In the pursuit of more are you neglecting the other four important aspects of your life?
   

   1. Emotional / Mental health

   2. Physical health

   3. Relational health

   4. Spiritual health

TRUST ME. I LOVE growth and scale. Loooooove it. I just got tired of it being my master and I see that’s the case with so many others.

That’s it. If you know someone that will like to read this feel free to forward it over!

Peace,

C